Dennessa Writes

  Hi lovelies it's been a minute, it's a few weeks to Christmas, and I know there are a lot of reasons to feel downcast at the end of the year, especially if your years wishlist hasn't remotely been accomplished. Here is your reminder happiness is a choice, darling choose it. (Read that full stop as period). Let's start with what happiness is - it's all the memories you hoard to look back on and smile at, it's the excitement in your soul about an idea yet unfleshed, it's the pockets of laughter ear n there. Happiness is the sheepish smile you have around your lover, the joy you exhibit whilst you dance in church, that feeling when your favorite musician drops an amazing tune, the cheer from your evening rigmarole. (Do not read this full stop as period oh, it will take away from the mushiness). Feel free to add your idea of what happiness is in the comment section, my darlings. Now people tend to think that happiness comes from achievements. Don't misint...

 It's easier to relate with you, I don't feel the need to act a certain way, To have a certain " "... I feel at peace, and loved, and protected, yet... I am not in love. Maybe because I feel the need to be more, And if you're not asking for more, that should mean I am enough. But I've never felt like I was enough, so how do I reconcile? This love you have for me, It's consuming me, I should finally be content, Yet if I dare say, I'm ravenous, Your love is interesting to watch as it unfolds but, I'm not sure I want to see past the wrapping sheet.  It's easier to navigate through things with you, I don't need to act like I know where I'm headed. To pretend that I " " ... I feel at home, safe, and secure, yet... I am not in love. Maybe because I'm constantly searching, And if you aren't looking for something, it means you've found what you need. But, I've never felt like I was needed, so how do I reconcile? This l...

 Slowly but surely the darned pandemic began to sneak into my providence too. The news reeked of loom, so I no longer turned it on. Yet, all I wanted to do was call you, and I didn't believe it when you sent the message... it was a two liner, yet this was the reply I wanted to give    Dear You,     I've missed you, so darn much. How are you? What does it feel like being away from family right now? How are you feeding? Do you need me in anyway? Did I say I miss you, because I do. And yeah I love you immensely.   Yet, after so long a time waiting for you to reach me, I found myself leaving you on read. 

 Oh poor me!!! My children look at me with disdain They're eager to forget our fight for freedom Oh poor me!!! My children have taken turns to rape me They've taken their knives and scarred me Oh poor me!!! Those who should cater for their wounded mother are appalled by the sight of her They plot evil against her Oh poor me!!! My children pander with new mothers Who's the savior that'll save me? Oh poor me!!! My once fertile land is almost barren My emptiness is an outcry to mothers like me Oh poor me!!! A giant that is no longer tall The dwarfs now cast me as lot Oh poor me!!! I'm indebted to all and sundry Each looking for a way to own me But... I'm still standing, though I stand with a slouch I'm still moving, even though I stagger throughout  I'm still expectant though I've been termed sterile The children I'll yet birth will be better than the ones who drove me to the ground.

 "Pillow talk is an intimate, authentic, unguarded conversation that occurs between two lovers", says Alisa Ruby Bash. I agree with the intimate, authentic and unguarded conversation part, but for this post I'll have to leave the lovers part and say that it's the conversations you'd rather have with your inner man, simply because you feel no one else would understand.  Some nights I stay awake conversing with my inner man, the part of me that comes alive with daily affirmations. I tell her you're strong enough to beat this, you're tough enough to continue, you're anointed enough for a breakthrough, you have a superfluous amount of grace for your designated race. These are on the nights that my spirit is high and or inspired by a sermon. This isn't always the case.  Welcome to the blog lovelies, remember your conversations birth convictions, be unavailable for negative conversations that are dour to your being. Feel free to say miss me with that non...

Bloody September!!! I used to connote this month with blood because its the death anniversary of the man who taught me how to love.  Hey lovelies, welcome back to the blog. Please tell me what has happened since the last time we were here in the comment section. Don't forget to share 😉 Today's about a topic rarely discussed; what to do after grieving. A lot of people had a lot of advice for me when Fay passed, how to handle the grief, how to move on from your first love, how to live again, how to keep the faith, how to learn to love again. Some advice I did away with, some were golden. A lot of people helped me thus far and I don't take it for granted. However, nobody told me how it'll feel when the grief eventually passes.  It's been four years since, a lot of turmoil and tears later, dare I say, and I dare say; the grief has passed. Something happens yet, I sometimes feel the need to feel something, I'm in a loop atimes wondering, is it too soon for the grief...

 I was told not to play with the street kids while growing up, they were not allowed in our house and I wasn't allowed anywhere near them, but kids will always be kids and boundaries were never enough to keep us away from playing. However to pass muster with these kids I so loved to play with, I needed to pick a few of their slangs - and that is where I got the slang leggediz benz (it actually means your legs, since growing up a mercedes benz was en vogue, a leggediz needed a benz to tush it up). Welcome to the blog lovelies its been a minute, sorry for the long break in transmission. Have you heard of small girl, big god? Thanks for coming?  My sponsor? And Uniport girl? A litany of codes that mean anything but their literal meaning. On the streets of Port Harcourt, I found out while cruising my leggediz that in this city, the order of the day is keeping up. This simply means living a false life, you know; those who drink garri inside the house and come out with toothpick, th...