Battle of the sizes

 Hard as it might be, be mindful of what you say around kids. Hey lovelies, I can't remember the last time I was sweet to y'all forgive me. Life's goings-on have a way of stripping you of manners, but manners maketh man.

Body shaming equals body loathing which equals inferiority complex. I know the route down there. I frolicked around that environment for far too long and sometimes I still dabble around its nooks and crannies. Holup! When we talk about body shaming y'all just rush to fat. I have never been fat, I weighed a whooping..... 2.9kg at birth and in my latest of late 20's, I cannot boast of even weighing 65kg, I'm at 64 right now, I take the win. 

A takeaway from this post should be that you can body shame a fat/thick person or lean/thin person, either way, do not!

Ah, ah Chidera you no sabi chop oh, try so that man fi see you marry. Nkechi you go start to jug oh your yansh don too big. Beati e be like you go start to drink apetamin e be like fat no jus dey ur body. Ah, Linda ya leg dey swell for only this small sidon you sidon, go gym oh, na obesity. Stop it. Shove your condescending, malicious and harmful comments up your butthole, I hope it gives you constipation. I've often said it before and imma tell it again, if you don't have something nice to say, or cannot constructively put your advice out, keep kwiet dear! Linda, Nkechi, Beati and Chidera have eyes, have mirrors and sure as heaven know what they're going through. They don't need your reminders.

That child you call alika, bonga fish, omokekere, you can keep the list going in the comment section. That child grows up being unusually self-conscious. Some proverb daddy used to say, "old women are uneasy when dry bones are mentioned", falls into place here. Foodie, fatty bombom, egbeweja. It isn't a pet name, nickname or anything of the sort. It is you giving them a tag that will outlive their childhood mannerisms and mould them, inadvertently so.

My struggle with weight has been monstrous. Being a first child who's younger siblings are bigger than her is no joke in a Nigerian home. My shtick became self-depreciating humor. Put on a tough skin whilst looking for a solution. Solution to what really? I was stressing out about my appearance, googling appetite enhancers, force feeding myself, running kiti kata. I've heard my thick friends talk about skipping meals, starving literally and all for what? It might sound cliché but loving yourself has to start over everyday. When the reflection of yourself in the mirror isn't what you bargained for, like, oh my God these love handles are flabby, love them. Oh, my! My buttcheeks are almost nonexistent, love them. My neckbones are as deep as a bucket, I can fit iwater in there, love them. I cannot foresee a neck in the nearest future, I'm all head, shoulders and round, love it. 

Don't let society define your beautiful. You're unique, your genes different, your stature and physique customized to you alone. So what if you don't look like Tiwa or Tems? Why can't you look like Dennessa (or add your name here) and work it?

Ps, apetamin almost damaged me in my battle for weight gain. That's a whole other blog post of its own. Love your imperfect self perfectly people.